TruMama

7 years ago this happened…

and it is the best thing that has ever happened to me. No doubt.

I love when I get a package in the mail. It’s exciting, no matter what it is.

Shampoo, dish detergent, or a new book.

Does not matter. Seeing the delivery truck stop in front of the house makes me smile.

That is what every single day is like with you. Like getting a package.

April 26, 2009 I delivered you, but you have been delivering to me ever since.

You deliver the sweetest smiles.

You deliver the boldest laughs.

You deliver quiet moments of thought and conversation.

You deliver wild romps of games and fun and jumps on the trampoline.

You deliver the most tender kindness and the most loving consideration.

Every day you open this beautiful world for me just a little bit more.

You open my eyes and my heart to see that real joy is in a simple moment.

The moment when you lay your head on my shoulder as I carry you to the car so early in the morning.

The moment I squeeze you tight at lunch before you push me away.

The moment I see you coming down the hall at the end of the school day.

The moment our heads are side by side on the pillow reading a book as you gently fall to sleep.

You deliver daily packages over and over again.

So many, in fact, I can not keep up.

These moments fly by, so I must slow down.

I whisper, “Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”

You are a gift.

Each moment is a gift.

This life is a gift.

Happy 7th birthday!

I love you too much!

7 years old.

I often wonder how I got so lucky.

7 beautiful years.

7 years of awe and laughter and just pure joy.

7 years of making my heart grow and soften.

7 years of creating this life that is so magnificent.

So splendid.

So preciously big.

7 years of shining your brilliant light into my world.

Making everything better.

Warmer.

Spreading love and tenderness.

7 years of heaven…right here on Earth.

I said wave and this is what I got…

I love you too much!

What to do on a gorgeous, spectacular SUNday?

Eat a popcorn snack on the trampoline. Duh!

And we shared with the puppies.

But all Lilu really wanted was her ball.

Then in for a rest.

Yeah. You asked for a bell.

I love you too much!

Friday night fun.

On the beach.

In the sand.

With my boy.

I love you too much!

Spring is green in all its glory

But life with you is burning gold

You start a fire everywhere that you go

The path lit

I follow

My lashes ablaze

The beach was on fire when you came into this world

Landscape glowing orange (…your favorite color)

Out of control

Explosive energy

This flame is in you

Burning bright

Spreading wide past fingertips

Sparks from footsteps

Your laughter feeds the flame

Kindle my heart golden boy

Ignite the day

Fuel the night

This fierce life

Burning gold

I love you too much!

Here’s the deal. We have been sick.

Real sick.

I get sinus infections, but that’s about it.

The flu? Nuh-uh.

Haven’t been that sick in years and years and years.

Not being one to watch tv, I pretty much just stared at the walls. In silence. Deafening silence.

So, coming out of a week confined to my bedroom…I’ve learned a few things.

1. You are way tougher than me. You were sick too, but you never complained, whined, fussed, or acted ornery. Quite the opposite of me. You kept your manners and were the most cooperative patient.

2. Real love is revealed. Daddy stepped up. What started out as a little scary…

became filled with tiny blessings.

♥ He made me hot tea with honey at like 3 in the morning because I could not quit coughing.

♥ He did lots of grocery shopping!

♥ He cooked lunch and dinner every day.

♥ He did the laundry.

And my favorite…

♥ He rubbed alcohol on my back.

3. Friends are your greatest treasure. Everything at work was completely taken care of.

Andrea took on my morning hall duty and did plans for the next coming week.

Aimee did lesson plans for the four days I was out, collected field trip money, printed reports for report cards, and pulled my papers for copying.

You find out who is there for you. You find out who is real for you.

4. I have a really awesome tribe!

5. A little company goes a long way. Dogs are the best at everything.

6. I feel so overwhelmed by all of these little acts of kindness, that I realize when I finally do feel better, I am gonna do so much better.

7. Just how long the days and nights really are. What an abundance of time we have on our hands to do with as we please.

8. I sure do miss laughing. Laughter is essential to my soul.

9. Nature is the greatest remedy. Oh how nice, when I finally got to sit outside for a few minutes and feel the wind brush against me…a gentle whisper of calm. And to feel the sun touch my skin with little tickles of warmth. Ahhhhhh.

We are better now.

I love you too much!

#writeyourlife

Here’s the thing. We talk in hashtags now.

For fun.

But, honestly, neither of us fully understands hashtags!

It all started the other week when you were telling us about a bad dream you had.

At the end of your story you said, “#worstdreamever!”

I laughed. You laughed. Daddy laughed.

Now, it’s a thing. We throw it in all the time. Just for fun.

Earlier today we were sitting on the sofa watching a video about a game you play and you were eating a chocolate bar (#makingamess).

Our conversation went a little something like this:

Tru: #getyourlegoffofme

Mama: #benice

Tru: #doofymama

Mama: #imgonnatakeyourchocolatebarbacktokroger

Tru: #imgonnaeatitfirst

Mama: #messychocolatehands

Tru: #getmeawashcloth

Yep.

#bestboyever #beautifulday #lovingeveryminute

#peaceout #iamagiant

#jumpingonthetrampoline #catchingsomeair #hiya

#toughguy #dontmesswithme #danger

#mytoybrokeintwo #idontknowmyownstrength

#idontevencare #gowiththeflow

#lockedout #beingcreative #timetopressurewash #ihatedeadplants

#racingmama #runforestrun #runlikethewind

#laughteristhebestmedicine #alwayshavingfun #meltsmyheart

#iloveyoutoomuch

#ilovejimmyfallon #makesmelaugh

There is nothing like outdoors.

Sun on your face. Wind at your back.

You have always been comfortable in nature.

As a baby, you would not want to take a nap or go to bed. We joked that you just did not want to miss anything going on.

So, we would take a little stroll…and BAM. You were dreaming.

I spent many nights under the stars pushing you in the stroller.

We might be bundled up in our winter gear. It did not matter. Out we would go.

The second you felt the air, your breathing changed. You relaxed. You would drift off.

Just so peaceful.

Nature. A part of you.

When it rains, most people come in. We go out.

You would choose to work outside, rather than play inside.

Spreading mulch? You’re the guy.

Picking up hickory nuts? No problem.

Raking leaves? You’re on it.

We ate outside. We played outside. We WERE outside.

And usually always with a garden hose in your hand!

Grammy and Poppy took you to the playground every day.

You would play for hours.

Your absolute favorite thing in the world was to just walk around the yard.

Just walk. And walk. And walk.

We would trek laps around the yard all afternoon and all weekend long.

The purpose?  To admire every little thing and to find the most perfect stick.

I had to be extra careful once you figured out how to open the door.

At any given second you were gone.

Out into the yard.

Out into your world.

I love you too much!

Song: Love ft. Lennon and Maisy

The thing about this love I feel,

is I don’t exactly know how to feel it.

All of it.

There are so many layers.

Just when I think I’ve got it…

I don’t.

You surprise me.

You catch me off guard.

Like one minute I am sound asleep

and the next minute you are laying on top of me, warm little arms wrapped about my neck, and you whisper ever so softly in my ear, “You’re the best mama ever.”

I haven’t even opened my eyes yet. I smile and think, “This. I am so lucky for this.”

My heart can not keep up.

Like the moment I am standing in the bathroom blow drying my hair

and then there you are. Laughing and jumping around, making silly sounds. I giggle and think, “This. I have so much fun because of this.”

You sprinkle joy all over my days. All over my moments.

Like one afternoon I am driving us home from school.

You quietly reread a note Daddy wrote you about your game and then you ask for a pen. You write something and then nod off.

When we get home, this…

Your little voice on paper.

You wrote Daddy back, “I love you, Tru!”

It is this.

This that you keep doing to me. Over and over again.

This that slows me down. Freezes life in an instant and makes me shiver with excitement.

You know that jolt that runs from your head to your toes from the contrast of the cold and makes you feel so alive. Makes every cell in your body tingle for a second.

This keeps me on my toes.

This is awesome.

This…

is life.

And for this, I thank you.

I love you too much!

My heart…constantly growing

Bursting right through my chest

My heart…constantly filling

Cascading a waterfall of joy

Those eyelashes…my heart

Those little freckles and the curve of that ear…my heart

Those big new teeth…my heart

That smile and that boy…my heart

I ask, “Tru, what is love?”

You say, “Happy, fun, and peaceful.”

Yes. Yes, that’s it. That’s simply it.

You just described my heart.

Thank you.

Happy Valentine’s Day

I love you too much!